humor

 1 - Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
 2 - The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
 3 - I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
 4 - Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
 5 - I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
 6 - I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.
 7 - What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
 8 - I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
 9 - I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
10 - Ahhh...I see the f***-up fairy has visited us again...
11 - I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
12 - It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
13 - Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
14 - No, my powers can only be used for good.
15 - How about never? Is never good for you?
16 - I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
17 - You sound reasonable...Time to up my medication.
18 - I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
19 - I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
20 - I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
21 - Who me? I just wander from room to room.
22 - My toys! My toys! I can't do this job without my toys!
23 - It might look like I'm doing nothing, but at the cellular level I'm really quite busy.
24 - At least I have a positive attitude about my destructive habits.
25 - You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
26 - I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself  in public.
27 - Someday, we'll look back on this, laugh nervously and change the subject.